let`s just point out first and foremost, that i`m listening to Stevie Nicks, "Talk To Me".
Damn, it`s a great song!
Stevie...i will talk to you.
anyway, moving on...let`s see, again it`s been awhile since i`ve written, and as i mentioned last time it`s been a very interesting time. truthfully it`s been a very rough time period. so much has happened. some things that i could never even imagine and others that i don`t even know what to say, i`m so amazed. yet, that`s life right? and as bad as things get, i know that there are others out there who struggle quite a bit more...
quick thank you to those who have helped talk me off the ledge or to be more accurate, not going over to someone`s house and slitting their throat.
So no bitching. Got to man up, or to go back to my roots, Cowboy up! yeah, that`s right, i was born in Oklahoma.
but, here`s the topic today. What is the real costs of chasing your dream?
well for me, it`s quite a bit. i will lose everything materialistic that i once thought was important: Porsche, BMW, House, expensive clothes, watches, dining out, etc...
It`s all gone, or going.
And you know what, i`m okay with that. Very okay. I`m finally at a place in my life (and sad that it`s taken 35 years, almost 36) to realize what is truly important. you would think that i would have has this epiphany when i was in the hospital having my heart prodded and stents being put in, but it was only fleeting then. Now it`s smacked me dead in the face.
WHAM!!!
Friends, Family, and being happy is important. And that`s it.
Sounds simple? But for some reason it isn`t.
How many people are truly happy? How many people are just going through the motions? I was for the longest time.
Now i`m chasing my dream...i don`t have what I used to have, but i have even more now as i have complete and total comfort with who i am, and what I want to do. And i have great people in my life.
Yet, it hasn`t been easy, and still isn`t. But i`m tyring and refuse to give up, as it would be too easy to do so. Speaking of, i was offered a great job to get back into my old business. A great opportunity, a very high salary with commission! damn, ti was tempting, as i`m broke! but, i just couldn`t...couldn`t do it. It was hard, and i`ve thought about my choice to turn them down, but then i got a text from my girl, it read:
"...everything will turn out fine baby! i love you and i will live in a box if i have to just to be with you."
Wow.
Amazing.
Chasing the dream has caused some friction, as there are some people who have helped me out that i need to get back, and I will. just need patience...unlike some of these bill collectors who pester me! And all of them have. thank you. you have no idea how much it means to me.
So, again, the real costs...just changing from a life that was truly shallow, to one that is filled with passion and life. yeah, steaks are rare now, and not the way they are cooked, but in eating...but each day is exciting, and i always look forward to what each day will bring, and what opportunity will pop up!
plus, my mind is running with stories...and a large UK publisher has just contacted me to discuss publishing...
it`s just a matter of time...
but even if i do make it back to the financial life i had been accustomed to, there will be many changes...
Many changes.
anyway, this might be a little disconnected, so i apologize...
but in wrapping this up...yeah, to get what you truly want in life, you might have to suffer...and when things get dark, real dark, you can`t give up. you just can`t. you must forage on...
Never quit.
And stay positive! Even when it`s harder than hell to do so!
Stay positive and keep dreaming.
take care, talk soon.
s
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